I am getting sick.

This is very bad.

So far, this is perhaps the worst week for me to fall down ill.

I have an entire day full of very important meetings on Thursday, complete with people flying in from out of town to attend.

I have a major event to send people to that needs the prep & setup finished.

I have a bunch of training to give.

I have a houseguest right now.

I have a party being thrown for me on Saturday.

So if everyone could share their wacky, crazy sickness-aversion remedies, or just wish really, really hard for me to stay well enough to function until Sunday, that would be very much appreciated.

Sometimes just wanting it done (and not wanting to face one’s self the mirror after not doing it) is enough.

I really, REALLY didn’t want to run yesterday. What I really, REALLY did want was Sushi for lunch. And Sushi I got, along with agreeing to take over all the dog walking for the rest of the week if I didn’t run after work.

Speaking of Sushi (if I may digress for a moment) - despite the fact that I’ve been running 2-3 days/week and am going on my 3rd week of 2x sessions of getting my ass thoroughly kicked, I have been unimpressed that the number on the scale is not going down, and the pants aren’t yet feeling any looser. So I figured I’d start tracking what I’ve been eating (which I thought wasn’t all that bad).

And I found that indeed, what I eat most of the time is not all that bad. But I tend to ruin it completely with one disastrous food decision each day. For example: did you know that Gyoza is about 150 calories per dumpling? So 4 tiny Gyoza is about 20% of the calories I’m supposed to consume for an entire day? Me neither.

So now I’m using SparkPeople.com to track what I’m eating. And looking up what the caloric content for most foods are before I eat them. So far so good - though it’s only been one day.

Anyhow, back to the running. Last night we wrapped up week 5 of the Couch to5k program. It was a bit of an odd one.

Instead of doing 3 identical runs over a week, this week runners move into doing 3 progressively harder runs, going for longer runs each time. Day one is 3x 5min runs with 3 min breaks in between, day 2 is 2x 8min runs with a 5 minute break in between and day 3 is one 20 minute run.

Let that soak in again - twenty. minutes. of running. no stopping.

And let me remind you - this is on a program that, 5 weeks ago, had me running a mere 60 seconds at a time without stopping, and feeling like I was going to barf while my head and lungs exploded at the end of that burst.

To say I was a little nervous would be an understatement.

Anyhow.

I was all ready to brag about my 8 minute runs once I finished them, but I was foiled. I (usually) run on Mondays, Wednesdays & Fridays, and see my Trainer on Tuesdays & Thursdays. That particular day he had decided that he wanted to a cardio benchmark, and had me do a 12-minute run. With the caveat that I could slow down and walk at any point if I felt I needed to.

So I told myself I’d get to the 8 minute mark (since I’d be doing just that the next day) and see how I felt. And at 8 minutes, I felt… okay. So I kept running. For another 4 minutes. And it was fine!

I ran 12 minutes without stopping! At a 12min/mile pace!

I JUST RAN A MILE!

So the next day I did my 8 minute runs, and figured I’d save the bragging for after I finished the 20 minute run.

Run day came. And along with it, the promise of rain and snow. I put off the usual lunchtime run (when it was still pretty pleasant out), and opted for after work, hoping I’d feel more like running later on.

I didn’t. I wanted to do anything else.

But slightly more powerful than that, I wanted the run to be over with - and the only way to make that happen is to go out and do it already.

And so I did.

I ran.

For twenty whole minutes.

Without stopping.

And didn’t barf!

With tiny rainy snow-pellets pounding me in the face, and soaking wet feet. I did it.

And then I went home at ate soup. And skipped dessert. Stupid Gyoza.

It’s something I’ve wanted to explore for a long time, and with the upcoming slew of pictures to be taken and dress to fit into - not to mention the fact that I’d like my hot ass to actually fit into the hot shorts I bought last summer by the time this summer rolls around - I went and got myself a personal trainer.

I’m still doing the running thing (just finished the first run of Week 5! w00t! and also Barf! (or at least that’s what it feels like) but I’m not seeing any results other than being able to run further and faster (which is good and all, but I’d really like to see some physical changes too!).

Anyhow, trainer. I always thought personal trainers were solely for those who were primarily paid for either winning professional athletic games or simply being really, really, ridiculously goodlooking. Not so! The facility I’m training at is exclusively a personal training studio (meaning everyone working out there is doing it one-on-one with a trainer) and there is a very broad section of clientèle there. People ranged in age from their 20’s to 60’s, of varying fitness levels, and NOBODY in there was good looking enough to be paid for it.

It is, however, exactly as expensive as I thought it would be. Actually - a little more than I thought it would be. I figure, I pay someone $40/week to walk my dog twice weekly, I should value an investment in my own health and fitness at least twice that much. It is most certainly an investment in health and fitness. And certainly more than twice as much as dog walking for my two sessions a week. I had to seriously cut back on some things (shoes, CDs, fancy restaurants, new books) to make it happen. It’s still a lot. It’s a lease on a pretty nice car. But I think it’s worth it.

In any case, I had my first session last night, and even with the “easy” introductory session I worked harder than I ever do without serious prompting. I can probably count on one hand the number of times I’ve sweat like that while exercising. I’m just not good at pushing myself that hard. Few people are (if you are one of them - good for you! Save your pennies, and maybe buy me a CD or something?). Those lunges never would have happened without some serious persuasion.

Also, I’m paying for the knowledge and experience of someone who’s spent a lot of time studying the human body, and exactly how to get it at its peak in the most efficient way possible. There is certainly something to be said for going through an exercise that I’ve done a frillion times before, only to have my posture and method adjusted slightly, upon which said exercise becomes way harder and more effective in the good ways, and way less inclined to hurt me in other ways. It’s an investment in efficient use of time and resources as well.

Anyhow, today I was a bit sore, but felt good. And I go back for more tomorrow. It’ll be an interesting experience, since it’ll be the official “benchmarking” appointment where all the weighing, measuring and otherwise evaluating will happen. I’m not really looking forward to hearing (yet again - since I haven’t exactly recovered from wedding dress shopping where the woman read out the number on her tape measure in disbelief, then measured again and was shocked to get the same result) how very many inches around my ass is - but I am looking forward to seeing how many of those I can lose in the next 9 weeks.

Week 3 is in the can. However, not without a serious episode of needing to get over my damn self already.

Last night I posted about not wanting to run and a long list of accompanying excuses. I figured I’d vent the negativity onto the blog and just go home and run.

And so many more excuses lines themselves up on the way home. Missed buses, increasingly bad weather, and then the final straw:

I grabbed my shorts out of the laundry, and despite the fact that I very carefully tied up the drawstring on them, it untied itself in the wash and was halfway pulled out. And with the level of clutter and nothing-having-a-home-ness around here, I had no idea where any tool to fix it would be.

I gave up.

I tried to console myself with a new oMop and by finally getting a lot of the cleaning up and laundry done (which included finding the mechanism by which to fix the aforementioned shorts - aka safetypin). The chores got done, but I didn’t feel any better.

Then I read all your comments. And I felt like a huge ass. So thank you to everyone who commented or emailed or otherwise nagged and cajoled me.

I needed a little Yoda-therapy: there is no try, only do.

But by the time I finally realized that, it was quite late. So I just continued to feel like a huge ass (with a huge ass) and tried to figure out when I’d run the next day.

To add insult to injury, the weather during the day today was the closest thing to beautiful I’ve seen around Raincouver for a long, long time.

So I got over myself and just did it - I played hooky from work for an hour this afternoon. (Can you still call it “hooky” if you get flex hours and can telecommute, and go back to working at home later?)

I came home, grabbed the dog, and ran. And it was lovely!

And once I got back, I made a smoothy and picked up the computer and looked outside and it had just started raining.

So this running thing, it is still going pretty well. I am only one run away from completing Week 3 of the Couch to 5K program.

Of course, this is about where I stalled on Week 2, three times over. One run left to do, and can’t be arsed to bother. Something comes up (or down, in the case of rain) and I just end up neglecting my sneakers in the closet.

Then I don’t run for four or five days, and I need to start that week again.

So far getting over the hump last time was made easier because I’d just started using the nike+ipod setup. It’s just really damn cool to have run data collected and be able to upload it and track my progress. Not only feeling like each run is a bit easier, but having evidence that I’m improving my time per km and seeing the cumulative distance rack up is also making a difference.

But today… ohhhhhhhhhhh today. And I am so right there again today. I’ve been doing so well for so long, and today I’m just all gaaaaaaaaaaah I don’t wanna.

- I am tired.
- I am bloated.
- It is raining.
- My right hip-flexor is being all tweaky and weird.
- Things at home need unpacking/cleaning/putting away.
- I’m sick of that particular workout (5min warmup, run 90s, walk 90s, run 180s, walk 180s, run 90s, walk 90s, run 180s, 5min cooldown).
- I hate the music on that particular Couch-to-5K podcast.
- I set a goal on nikeplus.com to run 24 times in 8 weeks - so far it’s telling me I’m 2 runs behind - and I’m feeling like more of a miserable failure instead of any sort of motivation to work on bringing that back up to even.

So, gentle readers, this is where I ask for your help. I want to do this run. At least, some little part of me does. Help convince the rest of me that it would be a good idea! Leave some sort of motivating reason for me to run tonight in the comments. Please?

Because:
- My iPod battery is almost dead
- My favourite running socks are dirty
- I can do it tomorrow….

Netchick’s living vicariously, asking everyone what they got for Christmas. And I’m happy to oblige!

Some new running gear: an iPod Nano, the Nike + iPod pedometer/workout tracker and some new kicks to put it in, since my current runners were looking mighty sad.

And a year’s subscription to Cook’s Illustrated Magazine.

These will either be highly complementary, or cause a great deal of cognitive dissonance in 2008.

It seemed like a good idea earlier this week to book the nurse’s appointment for 8:00am on Saturday, since we’re usually up ridiculously early most days anyhow, and rarely sleep past 7:00am on weekends. Hey, did you know that when you buy life insurance, they send someone over to take your blood pressure and make you pee in a cup? Anyhow, this whole process also requires fasting for 3 hours beforehand, and I figured the less time I was without snacks or coffee, the better - so 8:00am it was. And then we’d be free to get on with our day without waiting around for our appointment.

And then this past week happened, with having to navigate managing work’s presence at a local event, go on an off-site course and do all the regular work stuff quite literally all at the same time. A couple 12-hour days later, and suddenly 8:00am Saturday seems like a very bad time to have some random stranger with rubber gloves and a clipboard show up at my door.

So the alarm went off at 7:00, and I snoozed it until 7:36, at which point I figured that despite his status as a health-care professional, I should probably put on pants for the impending visitor, and stumbled into the bathroom for my morning pee. Oops.

Mid-stream it hit me - I’m going to be required to pee again in about 20 minutes - without the aid of coffee.

We went through the questionnaire, we went through the height/weight/blood-pressure checks. I went through a couple glasses of water. Neil went through his questionnaire. He went through his height/weight/blood-pressure checks. I went through another couple glasses of water. Neil peed in his cup. I went through another couple glasses of water. The only thing I had to offer were complaints about my now painfully distended belly full of liquid, and not a drop of pee.

The nurse waited around for another 15 minutes - I still couldn’t pee.

And not for lack of trying! Oh how I tried! I tried relaxing, I tried willing myself to pee, I tried running my hands under very cold then very hot then very cold water, I tried applying pressure to my general bladder area. Not a damn drop.

So the nurse agreed to break the rules since we appear to be generally upstanding citizens, and not the type who’d have a stash of someone else’s pee in the bathroom, or otherwise try to cheat the test. He left me with the jar, instructions not to have anything but water until after I’d peed, and to please record the temperature of the pee (there’s a stick-on thermometer on the outside of the cup) and he’d come by and pick it up in-between some other appointments nearby later on.

Finally, FINALLY about 20 minutes (and another glass of water for good measure) later, I peed! Neil cheered, we High 5′d and did a happy dance (ok, I drew the line at the dance - I haven’t needed celebration for going pee-pee in the potty since I was 2 or 3) and I dutifully recorded the temperature of my sample. And the nurse came back, gave me a receipt for my contribution, and in about 3 weeks our next of kin can throw us under a bus for a tidy sum.

But now, of course, I can’t actually leave and get on with my day, because with all the water I drank earlier, I can’t stop peeing. Seriously. Every 10-minutes or so I need to go again. And I suppose it didn’t help that I finally had coffee as well.

And I was going to try and think of something pithy to close this with, but I need to pee again.

How awesome is my boss? So awesome that after the whirlwind of work travel, she gave me (in addition to a nice cash bonus) new running gloves and socks, as some incentive to get back into my running routine, since it was interrupted and had basically died.

I test-drove the gloves and socks on Monday morning when I ventured out in the cold for my first run in about a month.

The gloves are awesome - kept my hands nice and warm, without being sweaty at all. Now I just need a similar product for my ears (perhaps the matching hat!), because holy hell it’s frickin’ freezing at 6:00am!

The socks were great too - thin, comfy, dry-fit wicking material, unique left-right specific padding, and “the Nike Swift technology provides advanced aerodynamics to reduce drag and help you run more efficiently.”

That’s right. Ankle drag. That’s what makes me so slow. Not doughnuts, ankle drag.

Incentive and excuses! It’s the gift that keeps on giving!

I made it back on Thursday from “Fabulous Las Vegas” and am so incredibly glad the crazy travel time is over. Now we can get on with crazy running time and crazy moving time and crazy wedding time - hopefully in that order.

Vegas was good, though was really all work. And while I love what I do, it doesn’t make for very interesting blogging, so suffice to say I rocked the casbah with my trade-show-fu, and didn’t do much else. Quick hotel review: THEHotel at Mandalay Bay is really nice. So is Mandalay Beach. But the two are a 1/4 mile hike through the casino/mall apart. You have been warned. Quick restaurant review: Alize at the Palms is really not worth the money. Sensi at Bellagio really is worth the money.

Running update: I haven’t run since the day before I left for New York. I feel like a whale out of water - all floppy and useless and struggling to breathe. Now that I have the time and inclination to do anything but work and sleep, I’m going back to Week 2 of the Couch to 5k program.

Moving update: We finally dealt with securing our mortgage. No I don’t wanna talk about the rate (which, like all rates at this time, is atrocious). I also don’t wanna talk about how the GST is going down another 1% 2 weeks after our current estimated closing date. It’s ok, I didn’t want those thousands of dollars anyhow. We are trying very hard (and mostly succeeding) to be Zen about it all, since we can’t do anything about it anyhow.

Wedding update: Our engagement announcement ran in the Province and Sun last weekend (November 3 & 4, 2007). Thanks again to everyone who called/emailed/sms’d to pass on well-wishes. I’m not entirely sure how long the online version runs (I think I remember my mom mentioning 3-months or so), but you can also see it online for the time being here. Other than that, planning keeps on keepin’ on keepin’ on.

So, as mentioned previously I’ve decided I’m going to start running. In fact, I’m slightly past “deciding” since I’m on week two (after doing week 1 twice) of the Couch to 5K 8-week running program from coolrunning.com.

So why running?

I am not a joiner. While I liked rowing as an activity, my past experience reminds me that a sport training on someone else’s schedule is going to frustrate rather than motivate me. Plus (snob that I am) I want an activity for fitness and me time - not another social activity. Honestly though, I’m super busy these days and hardly see the friends I already have, and the whole team thing doesn’t really work if you don’t engage in any “off the water/field” teambuilding. I suppose I could row a single but I don’t like them much, I far prefer the bigger boats.

I also loathe having to travel to my activity - dragging gym clothes plus work clothes plus all the necessary equipment to get from one into the other (hair-things, body-things, makeup, etc.) just plain sucks. I want to roll out of bed, do my thing, then get straight into my own shower and get on with my day.

I must work out in the mornings, before work. Not only does it get me going in the morning (which is what I’m really looking for), but once I’ve sat down for dinner or on the couch on any given weeknight, I’m not likely to get up again. Once I’ve slowed down or stopped for the day, that’s it. Ask Neil, who pokes me back awake at about 9:30pm after I’ve fallen asleep on the couch for the umpteenth time and points me in the direction of the bedroom so I quit drooling on the upholstry.

Impressions so far

Running, when done properly, doesn’t totally suck. Sure after my first run I felt like I’d been hit by a truck for 2 days, but when I ran again on the 3rd day the very same run was noticeably easier. Then when I left it for 4 days, it was more difficult again. Instant results and feedback like that do a lot for motivation*.

A good training program also makes all the difference in the world. I’m using the Couch to 5k podcasts created by Rob Ullrey - they make it wicked easy to just plug in and go. No checking my watch every few seconds to gauge time, and some great ambient tunes that I can listen to while I just focus on that elusive “point in the distance” that I tell myself I need to get to.

Another thing that surprised me: I like mornings. What I don’t like is getting out of bed - but once I’m up, mornings are awesome. I am a “morning person.” Anyone who knew me during my teenaged years will likely fall down in shock and disbelief right about now, but it’s true. This whole morning person thing also makes me feel markedly better about definitely not being a night-owl (see: falling asleep on the couch around 9:30 just about every night).

Running makes me HUNGRY! That whole kick in the pants to my metabolism at 6:00am gears me up to be pretty ravenous for the rest of the day. So far I’ve been mostly good about responding to HUNGRY with APPLE instead of COOKIES - but only mostly. One thing at a time, people.

There is a camaraderie among runners. Those people I used to glance at the few occasions I was out and about at such an ungodly hour thinking “they must be insane” are now nodding and smiling and sometimes even saying “hello” to me in the mornings. You know the saying “if you can’t see the crazy person nearby, you are the crazy person nearby?” I’m now the crazy person.

So, all told, running has been going pretty well - I’ll fill you in on my progress again in a week or so.

*The week 2 program is seriously kicking my ass. I’ve run it 4 times, and still want to barf at the end every time. I’m just waiting for it to feel “easy” once, and I’ll ramp up to week 3.

You can’t imagine how unbelievably sad I am to be writing this entry.

Ending any relationship is hard, but this one meant more to me than most. It’s seen me through so much, been with me through good times and bad, and its warm, comforting embrace has been the one constant I’ve had to rely on when nothing else was going right.

My friends, I am off coffee.

I’ve been pretty ill for quite some time. Since late March I’ve been dealing with being completely irregular (varying widely from one end of that particular spectrum to the other), and random attacks of nausea. It’s gotten to bad that I’ve had to walk out on dinners (because just being in the presence of food is enough to trigger illness) and have bolted from a cab, upstairs to the bathroom just in time to hurl. I have spent more nights than I care to admit to myself curled up in the fetal position waiting for the sweet release of sleep - or death - or anything to make me stop feeling like my torso is being turned inside-out.

Now I’m at a point where I don’t like going out much, because I have no idea how I’ll feel or what might happen (it tends to come out of “nowhere”). I’ve lost 5lbs - but not in a good way. I’ve actually mostly abandoned any sort of serious exercise routine, because on a daily basis I’m never sure if I’ll be able to consume enough calories to make it through a workout without fainting. And of course, the lack of exercise means my energy levels have gone waaaaaay down, and I’m mostly tired all the time.

It was clearly time to do something about this, and I’m already familiar with the processes of dealing with GI distresses - so I started paying really close attention to everything I do and eat.

And one constant I’ve found is coffee.

I’ve not had any for a few days (or the couple cups I have had made me pretty sick) - and I’m already starting to feel better.

I almost wish I didn’t.

But for now, coffee is dead to me. Really rich foods (especially dense, dark chocolates) and wine are on notice.

Of course, if I actually have to move either one of those to the banned list, life may not be worth living anymore.

At the moment, though, things are slowly getting better - and Neil has switched from delivering java in the mornings to tea instead.

So, I do believe that at some point last week, I promised a post of things that don’t suck. And failed to deliver. But! I do have, hot off the presses, something that definitely does not suck!

FREE STUFF!

Because I referred some friends to SPUD, I (out of 83 eligible referrers) won their draw for a prize! Three free sessions to build a personalized strength training and nutrition plan from Duquette Strength!

I had my first meeting with Roy Duquette today, and boy was that a wake-up call.

I know I’ve been feeling generally mushy and sluggish over the winter months, but I found out today that while I’m the same weight, and even a little thinner than I was a few months ago, my body is comprised of a whopping TWENTY-NINE PERCENT body fat. Gross. I have scenes from Fight Club running through my head. My poor, abused body only has 89.6 lbs of lean muscle mass doing the work to carry my lard around.

Hopefully, with Roy’s help, that’s all about to change.

I’ve picked up some supplements for protein, healthy oils, and greens, and have strategies to incorporate those into my already pretty healthy (but admittedly carb-heavy) diet. I go in later this week for a postural and alignment analysis, to tweak the nutrition plan, and to get started putting the workout together. After that I have one more free session of personal training.

And since we’re on the topic of health and all, there are a couple websites that have been sent my way for quick reviews - they’re both worth a glance.

Along the Fight Club lines, there’s a web campaign out (www.bewiseaboutbeauty.org) by the American Academy of Cosmetic Surgery. It’s exactly what you think - an information site about the details of various procedures, and recommendations on how to find a cosmetic surgeon.

Most interesting factoid? That Liposuction does not actually remove cellulite. Because tight bands of fibrous tissue cause cellulite, extracting the fat layer that resides just under the skin may actually worsen the dimpled look. Armed with that tidbit, I suppose I’ll just restrict my own personal plastic surgery experience to watching Nip/Tuck.

The other site is more about nutrition, but far less user-friendly. At eatbetteramerica.com (a project of General Mills) there are a few fun things to look at - if you can get past the super slow-loading flashy mc-flasherness of it all. While the site thankfully doesn’t brow-beat the user with brands the way some other sites (Kraft Foods) do with their “ingredient assembly” excuses for recipes - there’s nothing really revolutionary here for anyone who’s well-versed at all with basic principles of nutrition.

There is a pretty nifty section on how to “Healthify my Recipe”, where the test chefs take Aunt Ida’s Fatty McFatterson Mac & Cheese recipe (among others) and change the ingredients up a bit to make it less of a heart-attack in a bowl.

In case you don’t want to suffer through the flash (which has twice crashed my browser whilst typing this), I’ll give you the Readers’ Digest Version: Don’t start every recipe with a pound of butter, put down the fucking whole milk and eat a carrot or two!

Though I guess it’s hard to make these kind of changes when you don’t know where to start. And if you absolutely must have the Macaroni in your life, may as well make it healthy.

Which brings us back to my experience today. Roy was awesome in helping me find ways to incorporate extra supplements into things I’m already eating! My morning smoothie gets a boost from some greens powder and flax oil. Even my morning Choffee (hot chocolate powder in coffee) changes to Chocolate Whey Isolate powder in Coffee. Giving up coffee was non-negotiable.

So, armed with some new knowledge, and about to be gifted with more, I’ll try going about my day a bit more mindful of increasing my lean mass and getting fitter instead of fatter.

I’ll report in again as things progress - perhaps in a week, perhaps in a month - depends on how fast my body composition changes. Of course, it would probably go faster if I’d decided against my post-gym, drive-thru Chicken Snack Wrap on the way home from my appointment with Roy - which (FYI), if you are a fast-food lover, is another thing that (in my Mc-deep-fried-chicken lovin’ opinion) does not suck.

The ColdFX stops working if you stop taking it.

Someone please scrape out the inside of my face. It might feel better.

*whimper*

Fiancé is sick
Fever, aches, chills - a big mess
Ginseng Pills. I’m well.

I keep meaning to write, but I really have nothing exciting or interesting to say.

But I got sick of seeing the Fiber Bar entry, so here is a boring, uninteresting update.

Read on if you dare…

Because I have no kids, and don’t know too many people who do, I was completely oblivious to the fact that March 15, 2008 is the first weekend of Spring Break. So plans to have a wedding at a destination resort that day were firmly thwarted. The weekend following that is Easter. Of the remaining March Saturdays we’ve decided on the 29th. So a year from today we’ll be gettin’ hitched. Kookookachoo.

I’ve enlisted the services of a professional resumé writer, and used the past week as time to get my portfolio together and get a bunch of other long-overdue errands done. I still don’t like being at home all day, but I am getting used to it.

We’re hosting the 2nd annual Cinco de Mayo fiasco. Hopefully with slightly less hostess-experienced fiascos this year. That said, if you were invited last year, check your email inboxes (or the spam folders - it was sent through evite). If you somehow didn’t get an invite this year, this is the one occasion I open my house for all and sundry to partake in the debauchery and tequila. Comment or drop me a line if you’d like to join us.

Today I’m also playing Florence Nightengale. There’s some sort of flu-like thing going around and Neil has it. We also had his youngest sister over last night, and she sounds pretty sick too. So far I’m calling it the Watkiss Death Rattle, and popping ColdFX like there’s no tomorrow in an effort to ward it off. Then again, Gill has it too, so perhaps it’s some kind of Nerd Flu.

See. Told you life was boring ’round these parts. Anything exciting up with any of you?

Update (5:26pm): I am feeling snotty, and a wee bit achey. This does not bode well.