Have you ever wondered why I’ve called this series “Ridiculously High Standards” instead of something less foreboding? It’s because breaching one of these without a strong backup of coolness factor can very likely put the nail into the relationship coffin as far as I’m concerned. As I’ve said already, I’m totally willing and usually more than able to overlook small transgressions – as long as I’m already fairly smitten. But in the beginning stages, as soon as I’m unimpressed by something, I flee. Quickly.
And the scenario has just played itself out again.
Example: I’ve gone on a couple dates with Mr. Travelsalot. I was pretty ok with things as they were, until he sent me an email asking when a good time to call was while he’s been away this past week. I said Monday I was in class, and I’d be off doing my taxes on Tuesday, but any evening the rest of the week would be fine. He replied “Expect a call on Tuesday, hope I don’t take too much time away from your taxes.”
STRIKE ONE! Which part of my email signified that I wasn’t ALREADY BUSY on Tuesday? (RHS#5 – respect the other person’s schedule.)
That was all I needed to start the ball rolling. Things I had previously shrugged off and overlooked all came bubbling to the surface. Examples:
-He referrs to Lasik surgery as “getting your eyes cut.” Cut? that sounds like someone is adjusting your corneas with a steak knife.
-He told me I don’t ask enough questions of him. Sorry if I’m not into 20 questions. I’m from the “actions speak louder than words” camp, and figure spending time with a person is the best way to get to know him. Along the same lines, I wasn’t spared the constant barrage of queries.
-He routinely stopped, mouth agape, in the middle of conversations, then said “sorry, your eyes (lips, etc.) are distractingly gorgeous. Now every girl likes a compliment, but nobody likes a caveman. Control yourself. Along those lines (again) he regularly reminded me that I’m “earning brownie points” with him. I’m fabulous, I get it already. Move on.
-He thought it was remarkable and “too weird” that we both took the citrus wedges off our soft drinks, and made a little shield with one hand while squeezing the juice into the drink with the other. I don’t think that’s so much coincidence as courtesy, and safety. Nobody likes lemon juice in the eye. Ninety percent of the people I know make the little hand shield. Perhaps his friends and family are uncouth with the beverages?
–He talked during the movie (albeit a wee, tiny bit – but talking’s talking).
-I happened upon some hockey tickets for tomorrow night’s Vancouver Giants game, and since we were supposed to be going out that night anyway, I asked if he wanted to accompany me. He said “Sure, sounds like fun! I just hope my brother doesn’t show up.” Why’s that? Do you not get along with your family? (strike!) Do you not want me to ever meet your family, even by accident? (Strike!) Are you that socially awkward that in a city this small you couldn’t handle running into someone you know while on a date, and just introduce that date as a friend? (STRIKE THREE, YOU’RE OUT!)
-And while I’m on a roll, he’s not my physical type, which isn’t something I usually put a whole lot of stock into, but after all these other downfalls, being a hottie was really the last thing he could’ve had going for him.
So there you have it. I emailed him as soon as I got home from work (which was our primary form of communication thus far) and cancelled our date. No point in postponing the inevitable.
Except now I have an extra (free) hockey ticket for tomorrow night (Saturday March 19th). Comment if you’d like to go. Puck drops at 7:00pm.