1. There is no efficient way to fill 10,000 tiny cups of water fast enough to satisfy 10,000 thirsty runners.
2. Fifteen year old kids should never be asked to volunteer for anything. They don’t actually want to be there, and will only get in the way of those who are trying to accomplish things.
3. YOU CAN NEVER HAVE ENOUGH DIRECTIONAL SIGNAGE.
4. Apparently if you run, and have your nipples rubbing against your sweaty shirt, they will chafe and bleed. COURTEOUS RUNNERS TAPE THEIR NIPPLES OR REMOVE THEIR BLOODY SHIRTS. Red streaks running down the front of your white jersey do not make you look hardcore, they make you look gross.
5. Half marathons should be outlawed. Only because the runners are pretty worn out when they finish, but still have enough pep in them to abuse the volunteers who are just trying to fill 10,000 tiny paper cups.
6. Full marathons are to be encouraged, because the particpants’ energy levels range from totally exhausted to unconscious. However most of them still have the energy to say “thank you.”
7. A little thanks goes a long way.