Chick Exposure Rate

Alternate title: what happens when A Beautiful Mind meets Everquest.

“Right now my focus is on one of my stats that I call CER – my Chick Exposure Rate. See, as my CER increases, my probability of performing a critical hit (getting a date) dramatically increases. It’s just a matter of simple statisti-” Davis then broke off, his eyes following an attractive University of Florida co-ed on rollerblades.

“Yow! Now that’s a perfect level ten,” Davis said appreciatively.

Davis explained that talking to the “level ten” girl was out of the question due to his lack of experience. “When you first start an RPG, you don’t immediately strap on your leather armor and charge headlong at a Lich King. You’ve got to work your way up to it. And so it is with women.”

Basically this guy has decided to approach life as an RPG, in order to battle his social anxiety. He’s had to logically break things down into a situation he understands, in order to function as a socially apt human being.

I don’t know whether to laugh, cry, or break out the ~~20D~~ D20 (I just lost all my nerd cred).

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