Top of the World

It’s been this way for as long as I can remember.

I don’t know if it was because my parents really had to make sure Santa was gone, or if they had to wrap some last-minute presents, or needed to caffeinate before dealing with three small children, or just wanted some peace and quiet to makeout like teenagers in front of the tree for a while.

Whatever the reason, there is a Christmas Morning Ritual in my family.

My brothers and I were always forbidden to leave our rooms on Christmas morning before we got the “ok” from the parentals. We were every bit as stereotypical as you may expect for three middle-class suburban kids on Christmas morning, complete with the excited waking up at about 4am and wanting to see if Santa had been, and had he eaten the milk and cookies and can we open presents NOW?

Looking through the Wiederick family Christmas photo archives, there are pictures every year, for at least two decades, with three kids sitting at the top of the stairs, looking every bit as angelic as the very Nicest children on Santa’s Nice list. This is because photographs lie, and we had only paused for a brief moment from elbowing eachother, vying for the pole position from which to race down the stairs and around the corner to the tree.

Belief in Santa came and went, but for the sake of nostalgia, the rule stayed the same. Flying elbows and tiny feet were replaced by teenaged yawns and stumbling limbs – but every year we dutifully stayed in or near our bedrooms, and paused for the requisite “top of the stairs” photo.

Except this year. This year it was different.

In what seems like a gigantic tumultuous move which was really not much more than the passing of time and changing of seasons, and carrying on of life as it insists on doing, what were once five in one home has turned into three homes with girlfriends and a fiancé. It has brought the exchange of the familial home for a townhouse in a gated community that has the benefit of having someone else to mow the lawn and can be locked up for extended vacations without much worry, but not enough spare bedrooms to hold all of the offspring, and thus no anticipatory rush of three wee bodies as they hurled themselves down the stairs first thing Christmas morning.

And I did miss it. But that twinge was rapidly doused by the immense pleasure of what Christmas was this year.

Christmas was the one I love getting up at 3am to share one of his own traditions – to play Santa, placing a stocking at the end of my bed, where my sleeping feet would discover it full of goodies when I awoke in the morning.

It was hanging out for a couple hours with my own, tiny, new family as we did what we do every day – coffee and waking up in bed – with the addition of stockings and eggnog.

It was heading out to spend time with a family that embodies the fact that home is wherever you choose to make it. It was a turkey dinner in that new, impersonal townhouse, exactly the same as all those in line with it exactly the same as all the gated communities peppering suburban North America, which was the brightest, shiniest spot in the world that day, bursting at the seams with a family larger than ever before, and the happiness that only comes with an immense love – not only for everyone in the room that day, but for the extended family that’s sure to increase and visit over the coming years.

And when I wandered up the stairs in that townhouse alone later that day, I thought about how very, very lucky I am. And how, though time is relentless in its moving on, traditions don’t die – they only fade away if you let them. And I vowed that when the time comes, I will always place stockings at my own children’s feet, and subject them to the small purgatory of waiting at the top of the stairs until I give the OK – and hope that the memories I create will enrich their lives as the memories I’ve had created for me enrich mine.

Out with the old…

After the hustle and bustle of Christmas, and a few days on the North Island with cellular reception non-existent, and internet too spotty to bother using, I’ve been enjoying a very relaxed and decidedly un-wired holiday.

I think I’ll continue that for a few more days, though I did want to wish you all a very, very happy New Year.

I hope that when it’s all said and done you’ll have found that 2006 did indeed hold some good for you, and that 2007 is even better!

Merry Christmas

A very Merry Christmas to all!

Or Happy Monday if you swing like that.

My gift to you? One of my very favourite Christmas stories: Barrington Bunny by Martin Bell.

I’ve posted it in past years, you can read it here.

I hope you all have a wonderful, peaceful and rewarding Christmas Day full of everything you want this season, and a partridge in a pear tree.

A few of my favourite things

I’m posting this mostly as a reference and reminder to the man (who will swear right up until midnight on the 23rd that he has ages of time to do his shopping) – but also because I have not much else of substance to post, and on the off chance that the internets at large may want to buy me a gift (hey, a girl can dream, right?).

And so I present to you, after the jump, my wishlist for the Non-Denominational Consumer Orgy of Winter Spending 2006:
Continue reading

Carded

I made it through NaBloPoMo (hooray!), and promptly took a damn day off already!

But I did need to come back long enough to let all y’all know that if you’d like a Christmas Card from yours truly, you should definitely email me your address ASAP.

If you’ve sent me your address in past years, don’t assume I still have it. I’m notoriously bad at keeping such things (though I promise, this year I’m trying extra hard to actually make a freakin’ spreadsheet or something).

So what’re you waiting for? Christmas?

O Tannenbaum

As November draws to a close, and it’s FINALLY appropriate to start with the decorating of houses and wearing of Santa hats and sending of cards, there is a holiday dilemma that’s cropped up in my house.

When he heck are we supposed to buy our Christmas Tree?

A little background: I have been a fake-tree person for many, many years. I think the last live tree my parents had was when I was about 6. And I’ve always had my modest, wee, artificial trees in the various apartments I’ve lived in.

But lo, the man of the house has decreed that no plastic coniferous-tree-like abomination shall ever sully his holiday abode. And I’m up for some actual pine smell (epsecially now that I have a vacuum that sucks), so I figured, what the heck – real tree it is!

Thing is, this man of the house, he’s not so good with that whole “memory” thing – specifically in regard to the passing of time – and says things like “oh I totally did that just recently” when this thing he’s referring to actually occurred 7 or 8 years ago. Then when he realizes he’s conjuring up ancient memories he sits, mouth agape, at this betrayal by father time. How could memories that feel so fresh be so far past?

Or he says “Oh this other thing is still so far away, we have AGES of time to plan” – far away being about 3 days. Then when he realizes this other thing is only 3 days away (instead of the weeks he swore he had), he freaks out and pulls some sort of all-nighter to make up for the days that cruel father time sneaked right out from under him with nary a how d’you do.

So you can understand that when he says “Oh, we can totally get a tree this weekend, I always get mine right around now – it totally won’t die by Christmas” I’m a bit skeptical.

So now I turn to you, gentle reader, to clue me in: Can I buy a live Christmas Tree this weekend and still have it glorious and green, and not a brown and droopy shell of its former self by the 25th? If not, when?

And if I can, where the heck in the Vancouver city limits do I find such a thing? Because the man, all he remembers is going out into the woods at the back of a farm and cutting one down “like it was yesterday.”

Sparkling Lights

The Christmasing has begun in the Wiederick-Watkiss household!

We were good little environmentalists, and picked up a brand spankin’ new set of LED lights to adorn the railing, fence and tree on our deck.

I tried to take a picture, unfortunately, our wee point & shoot refusts to cooperate. You’ll just have to trust me that they’re lovely and festive.

Instead of pictures of our deck, I’ll give you one of my holiday favourites from last year: a house’s lighting display set to music.

p.s. Speaking of Cheer, don’t forget to email me if you want a Christmas Card!

Ho Ho, Yo!


Well it’s that time of year!

Time for you out there in blogland to email me your updated mailing addresses so I can send you a holiday card! And I promise I won’t stalk you, or sign you up for junk mail or porn… unless you want me to!

I don’t care where on earth you are – I’ll mail my greetings internationally.

You know you want something lovely in your mailbox this year, to counteract the negativity of the hoday credit card and long-distance phone bills!

Drop me a line before December 20th, and I can make sure that happens.

Updated to add: If you’d like to send a card back, let me know in your email and I’ll send my address back to you!

2006 – In with a Bang!

I toyed with posting this, as it’s a bit risqué for what I’d normally post here, however I find it too amusing NOT to blog. But I will include a bit of a warning:

This post contains adult subject matter. Continue reading at your own risk! Asterisks have been used to try and protect me from the scary googlers.

There, now that’s out of the way, I’ll also say that I do know at least one of the people involved in the following scenario, but I won’t tell you who, and names are being witheld to protect the adventurous…

Scene: Girl 1 (F1) and Guy 1 (M1) exiting adult video store on Granville St. at 1am on January 1st, 2006. Both appear fairly intoxicated, and are surrounded by hundreds of revelers.

M1: You can’t tell ANYONE about this!
F1: For the millionth time, I won’t!

Couple approaches crosswalk, waits for light to change. Other couple (F2 & M2) are also waiting to cross. These couples have never met.

M1: (to F2 & M2) She’s gonna f**k me in the a*s when we get home!
F2: looks at F1 & at black p*rn store bag in F1′s hand
F1: nods
F2: (to F1 & M1) “Wow, that’s f**king hot!” (to M2) “Baby, that’s so hot, how are we gonna top that?”
M2: stunned & speechless.

Light Changes. Couples go their separate ways, off into the night.

And they say Vancouver is a “No Fun City!” Hah! Here’s to both couples, hoping they found the… experience… they were looking for to ring in the new year!

Year in Review

What did you do in 2005 that you’d never done before?
I acquired this wee domain early in 2005 – I’d never owned one of my very own before. I also learned how to Row this year. Other than that, I spent a lot of the year rediscovering some passions I hadn’t been spending enough time on, such as reading, and the piano.

Did you keep your new years’ resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
Let’s see what I wrote down from last year:
Resolution: Make resolutions check
Resolution: Travel outside Canada or the US unfortunately, despite my best intentions, it didn’t happen this year.
Resolution: Buy a bigger bed hell yes I did!
Resolution: Have a big, swingin’ party for my birthday. yep

Looks like I did pretty good. I’ll definitely be working on the travel one again in 2006. Other than that, I’ve got some goals I’d like to achieve next year, but nothing I’m really “resolving” to change.

Did anyone close to you give birth?
No babies this year.

Did anyone close to you die?
Very thankfully, no.

What countries did you visit?
Again, I only managed to make a run for the nearest border.

What would you like to have in 2006 that you lacked in 2005?
A little more financial discipline. Although there isn’t much leftover, I did damn well for myself this past year, and ended up with a boatload of memorable experiences that I wouldn’t trade for anything.

What date from 2005 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Uh… The year’s been a busy blur, but it’s going down in the record books as a great one overall.

What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Never settling.

What was your biggest failure?
I almost settled. Thankfully, fate saved me from myself.

Did you suffer illness or injury?
Nope!

What was the best thing you bought?
Countless concert and hockey tickets. Again with the experiences.

Whose behavior merited celebration?
If someone needed to be told they kicked ass, I made damn sure they knew it.

Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Again, you know who you are.

Where did most of your money go?
I swear I’ve answered this twelve times over already.

What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Ray leaving.

What song will always remind you of 2005?
Every song from every show I saw this year. Too many to count.

Compared to this time last year, you are:
a) happier or sadder? happier
b) thinner or fatter? Thinner
c) richer or poorer? Richer. Both literally and figuratively.

What do you wish you’d done more of?
Made time to be still.

What do you wish you’d done less of?
Nothing.

How did you spend Christmas?
Quietly, with piles of family and food and drink. It was lovely.

How will you be spending did you spend New Years?
Oh how I wish I could tell you!

Did you fall in love in 2005?
Yes, with TiVo.

How many one-night stands?
A lady doesn’t kiss and tell.

What was your favorite TV program?
All of them.

Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
There’s a few people that I’ve lost any and all respect for.

What was the best book you read?
Have a Glass by Kenji Hodgson & James Nevison

What was your greatest musical discovery for 2005?
Madison’s Panic (There are really too many to name, but these guys are cool, so I’ll give up some linky love, for what it’s worth.)

What did you want and get?
Everything. I’m a spoiled princess.

What was your favorite film of this year?
Syriana

What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned a whole Quarter Century old. I threw a wee bbq here (one of many) and had a rip roaring good time.

What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Not having so many car troubles!

How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2005?
Beach Chic.

What kept you sane?
Beer.

Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Uh…. No idea. I’m going with “none.”

What political issue stirred you the most?
Gay Marriage.

Who did you miss?
If you saw my 2005 social calendar, you’ll realize I didn’t have time to miss anyone!

Who was the best new person you met?
Couldn’t possibly pick just one.

Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2005:
Just do it.

Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
“So one last touch and then you’ll go
And we’ll pretend that it meant something so much more
But it was vile, and it was cheap
And you are beautiful but you don’t mean a thing to me
Yeah you are beautiful but you don’t mean a thing to me”

-Death Cab for Cutie

Not actually as depressing as it sounds, but Death Cab was the best show hands down that I saw this year, and it sortof sums up my dating life the past year (noncommittal – not really vile and cheap).

So there you have it. A bit late, but it is what it is. Hope everyone’s year is off to as good a start as mine is so far!

Pre-Emptive Strike

Courtesy of the fabulous Ms. Raspberry. I may send out a few of these once I regain consciousness on the other side of New Year’s:

———————————————-

Dear Mr. / Mrs. ___________

I am writing to apologize for my ________ behaviour the other night, and i hope that despite everything, you can find it in your heart to forgive me. I should have known there would be a problem when your ______ first brought out the ________ of _______ that was so big it needed a handle. I was nervous about meeting you for the first time, and although i can usually hold my ________, i thought that having a few ________ would help me to _________. I was obviously very very wrong.

I honestly don’t remember much between _______ with your visiting relatives and _______, but i’m told that i made quite a scene. If past experience is anything to go by, I’m guessing I whipped out my ______ and said “______” a lot. I hope i didnt’ try to sit on your husband’s / wife’s _________ or make out with your ______, but at this point, nothing would surprise me. In my mind, I was just trying to be _______. All i know is that i woke up bathed in _________, with a blinding hangover, next to your ________ in the _________ in your driveway. I’m guessing you probably saw the big pile of ______ on the table where we tried to ________, but I’m hoping you didn’t walk in while we were ________. We disposed of the _______ in the ________, so hopefully you didn’t stumble across that, but i’m sure the lingering _____ smell was unmistakable. I have a vague recollection of the _______ arriving, so I guess the person the neighbours heard at 4am shouting “________” was me. Oops. Sorry again.

I’d be happy to pay for the _________ I broke (I only threw my ________ out of it because i thought it was open) and replace the tub of ________ and the plastic ________ that went missing, and if you have any trouble getting the _______ stains and the ________ marks out of the furniture, please send me the cleaning bills.

Please accept my sincerest apologies and this _______ that I made.

For what it’s worth, all the best of the holiday season, and once again, my deepest regrets for being such a _______, ________, ________. I don’t usually show people that side of myself until the second or third meeting.

Remorsefully,

________________________

PS – if a pair of black mesh _________ you don’t recognize turn up somewhere, they’re probably mine. Since you probably never want to see me again, you may as well just keep them.

And so it goes

And just like that, it’s all pretty much over.

Gifts have been given and received, family’s come and gone, food’s been created and consumed.

I’m currently curled up in one of two new sets of cozy pj’s, reflecting on the holiday. I got my very own Christmas miracle this year, and managed to be left to my own devices enough to plow through the 2nd half of “Memoirs of a Geisha” and all of “Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban” in just 2.5 days.

I had a lovely, reminiscent Christmas story all ready to post for y’all this morning, but I got too caught up making waffles for the family. And sometimes, that’s the way it should be. Maybe I’ll save it for next year.

I hope everyone’s Christmas/Hannukah/Kwanza/Festivus/Solstice/Sunday was exactly what you wanted, and best wishes for the best of the rest of 2005!

Home

Well, I’ve made it back to the homestead. Did a little last-minute shopping with dad, a little last-minute baking with mom, a little drinking and commisserating with the brothers, and it looks like I’ve got nothing left to do but relax and enjoy myself from here on in.

Hope your holidays are happy, wherever you are and whatever you celebrate.

From the WaterCooler to you, Merry Christmas!