WorldWideWaterCooler

How awesome is my boss? So awesome that after the whirlwind of work travel, she gave me (in addition to a nice cash bonus) new running gloves and socks, as some incentive to get back into my running routine, since it was interrupted and had basically died.

I test-drove the gloves and socks on Monday morning when I ventured out in the cold for my first run in about a month.

The gloves are awesome - kept my hands nice and warm, without being sweaty at all. Now I just need a similar product for my ears (perhaps the matching hat!), because holy hell it’s frickin’ freezing at 6:00am!

The socks were great too - thin, comfy, dry-fit wicking material, unique left-right specific padding, and “the Nike Swift technology provides advanced aerodynamics to reduce drag and help you run more efficiently.”

That’s right. Ankle drag. That’s what makes me so slow. Not doughnuts, ankle drag.

Incentive and excuses! It’s the gift that keeps on giving!

I made it back on Thursday from “Fabulous Las Vegas” and am so incredibly glad the crazy travel time is over. Now we can get on with crazy running time and crazy moving time and crazy wedding time - hopefully in that order.

Vegas was good, though was really all work. And while I love what I do, it doesn’t make for very interesting blogging, so suffice to say I rocked the casbah with my trade-show-fu, and didn’t do much else. Quick hotel review: THEHotel at Mandalay Bay is really nice. So is Mandalay Beach. But the two are a 1/4 mile hike through the casino/mall apart. You have been warned. Quick restaurant review: Alize at the Palms is really not worth the money. Sensi at Bellagio really is worth the money.

Running update: I haven’t run since the day before I left for New York. I feel like a whale out of water - all floppy and useless and struggling to breathe. Now that I have the time and inclination to do anything but work and sleep, I’m going back to Week 2 of the Couch to 5k program.

Moving update: We finally dealt with securing our mortgage. No I don’t wanna talk about the rate (which, like all rates at this time, is atrocious). I also don’t wanna talk about how the GST is going down another 1% 2 weeks after our current estimated closing date. It’s ok, I didn’t want those thousands of dollars anyhow. We are trying very hard (and mostly succeeding) to be Zen about it all, since we can’t do anything about it anyhow.

Wedding update: Our engagement announcement ran in the Province and Sun last weekend (November 3 & 4, 2007). Thanks again to everyone who called/emailed/sms’d to pass on well-wishes. I’m not entirely sure how long the online version runs (I think I remember my mom mentioning 3-months or so), but you can also see it online for the time being here. Other than that, planning keeps on keepin’ on keepin’ on.

Do you (bloggers) ever get to that point where you realize you haven’t written for a while, and you want to, but because it’s been so long you have no idea where to start - you want to apologize for not writing because it has been so long, but you’re not actually sorry because you haven’t been up to anything very interesting - though a few things have happened and you feel you should mention them but you don’t because they seem far too insignificant to appear as the first thing on your blog after such a long absence and you end up so frustrated at the situation and your need to put something on the page that you end up just writing a huge run-on sentence instead of any actual content?

Me neither.

Anyhow, here’s a brief sampling of what’s been up with me lately:

Wedding stuff is still going on with a minimum of crazy-inducing antics. Note I said minimum, not zero, and while minimum is obviously better than medium or maximum, it is still far more irritating than zero. I am attempting not to drive myself nutty over it and/or throw things. So far I’ve been mostly successful at both.

Our new place looks closer and closer to completion every time we go by. The retail stores on the ground floor have opening dates that fall within the next couple weeks, and they’ve finally pulled the blue plastic off the windows. It’s so close we can almost smell it. Which obviously makes us hate everything about the place we’re in more with each passing day we don’t get our official notice of occupancy. Oh the list I could create of things that I am excited to leave behind - including our impending rent increase.

I’ve started running (stop laughing, Mom!). It’s not my favourite thing in the world, but surprisingly, it doesn’t suck as much as I thought it would. A good training program helps.

The countdown to travel is on. I leave for NYC in 10 days. I’m gone for a week, back for a week, then go to Vegas for a week. I am simultaneously excited and terrified, because I’m the lead for both these events and would rather not fuck them up. I actually think the likelihood of that happening is approaching zero, but I don’t want to jinx it.

Any requests for which of these to expand on first?

To Me!

My one and only Champagne Birthday is coming up in two short days!

I’ll turn 27 on the 27th. Even cooler (at least I think it is) is that I’ll turn 27 on 27-07-2007.

I was going to throw a big party!

Until I was informed that there is something else in store.

All Neil would tell me is that I had to cancel the party, since I won’t be home Friday night (or all weekend at all, actually).

Other details I know:
-I should pack “airplane friendly”
-Dinner attire is required
-A bathing suit is not required

Anyone want to hazard a guess on what could be up?

Update: (July 26, 8:30am)

Because Neil is a horrible secret-keeper, and I am a) freakishly observant and b) a bit of a pest I can add the following two details:

-We are leaving the Country
-We are not leaving the continent

So uh… what are your votes for American or Mexican cities that I could be visiting?

The past week has been an absolute whirlwind - and a complete 180 from the 13 weeks beforehand.

I’ve been interviewing like mad (5 work-days, 5 companies, 7 interviews) and find myself presented with two offers (well, 3, but one is totally unsuitable, and the other two companies just haven’t replied yet).

In any case, I’m firmly wedged between the proverbial rock and hard-place with these two offers. Both are great. I’m having a really hard time deciding. So I figured, why don’t I ask the internets what they’d do?

First, the similarities: title, job scope, commute, industry, opportunities for mentorship, vacation time and benefits. You know, the things I was going to use as my differentiators when making the decision on the really *right* place to be.

And now, the differences:

Job One: Is exactly what I asked for when I first started this job-hunt thing. Mid to larger sized company on a growth trajectory. They have made a lot of recent acquisitions in the past months and need to expand their marketing department to deal with it. The majority of work would be doing brand unification and change management. I found this job through an internal referral. There wasn’t actually a position in existence, but a combination of really clicking with the VP of Marketing and their need for people led her to push through the creation of a position to bring me into the team. Speaking of which, there is a team of about 6 people - so lots of opportunity for collaboration. From the state of the company today this could be a great 3-5 year (or beyond) opportunity.

Job Two: Came out of a posted position I applied for. The company is a startup, going to market ideally in September. After researching the management team, questioning their motivation, business plan, beta program, funding and talking to some industry people who may be interested in their product this is a good opportunity. The majority of work would be doing product launch and buzz generation. There is some limited travel involved (about 10%). I’d be working primarily with the VP Marketing, VP Project Management and Director of Business Development. The position has been designed to ramp up to management (where I’d build a team of reports) in a fairly short timeframe. The starting pay is 13% higher. The offer comes with stock options - though I generally don’t take those into consideration. More often than not they turn out to be worth less than the paper they’re printed on. I don’t think this company will fail - but taking into consideration the current state of things, I see this to be an 18-month to 2-year opportunity before IPO or Acquisition takes place. I see acquisition with this particular product more likely, and that move would likely render my position redundant.

So - taking into account the facts I’ve presented (and probably ignoring my speculation) - what would you do?

I’ve even included a handy poll for your voting pleasure!

UPDATE! would those who are voting in the poll care to actually comment with why they’d make the choice they have? Thus far the comments and poll results are diametrically opposed.

I need to have an answer by the end of the day tomorrow. Of course I’m going to choose the one that I ultimately decide is best for me, but I am interested in what *you* would do, or if you think there are other factors I haven’t considered.

Because I’m feeling random like that

1. I don’t know if it was the full moon or what, but the dog decided last night that bedtime was a great time to go apeshit, and she tore around the bedroom at full speed, pausing only do to her crazy doggie doofus dance (picture bouncing repeatedly up on hind legs and waving front paws around while making growly, howly noises) for a good 8 minutes. It’s probably the closest I’ll come to owning a cat.

2. Who’s the lucky girl that got fresh apple-cinnamon muffins in bed this morning? Oh yes, that’d be me. Too bad an avalanche of metal baking trays cascading to the floor at 6:15am ruined the surprise!

3. My hands are suddenly, randomly covered in freckles. Just my hands. They appeared all at once about a week ago. Anyone care to play doctor internet and explain that?

4. My dill plant is taking over everything. Do you want some Dill? Come on over and get some. I’m going to have to do some serious bushwacking on it before it completely annexes the parsley.

5. Despite wanting to have one for the past two years, finally having a piano here makes me much happier than I initially thought it would. This is a good thing. I will probably now go blow the rent money on new sheet music, because playing “Kiss From A Rose” and the “Theme from Mission Impossible” over and over and over is growing old.

6. Facebook is completely unimpressive and uninspiring. I am on there because, as Grant pointed out in my comments, people are insisting on using it to plan events and keep in touch. But I’m a bit baffled at those who can spend hours on the site. Really - what are you doing on there?

7. I think the most disappointing part of our condo being delayed until December is the extra 6 or 7 months we’re going to have to live with this couch. It’s my “free from the parents’ basement so it’ll do college furniture” couch, and it’s creaky and ugly and old. I have dreams of a clean-lined sectional in microsuede.

8. I really want a yogurt maker. Does anyone know where to get one that doesn’t look like a spaceship and have the price-tag to match?

9. I’ve found the best summer makeup product, perhaps ever. Clinique Pore Minimizer Instant Perfector. The only thing that keeps me from re-enacting the Exxon Valdez on my forehead by 3:00pm.

10. I know no one cares what I had for lunch. But I had a gigantic organic tomato covered in coarse salt, and a Rosemary Rocksalt bagel, and people - it was spectacular.

11. Plus, I totally don’t have 13 interesting things to share.

12. Someone came over the other night and exclaimed their surprise at our half-dozen bottles of Sawmill Creek in the wine fridge. Believe me, I’m not too proud to drink the cheap stuff. If we had Trader Joe’s here, I’d totally be drinking Two-Buck-Chuck. Sure, we know and like good wine - but there’s certainly stuff out there that’s inexpensive and drinkable (if not interesting), and the Sawmill Creek varietals happen to be one of them.

13.This entire entry is an excuse for procrastination on a project I really should be working on. And now that the list done, I think I’ll go finish said project.

Someone was asking me yesterday about social networks. And what with the constant stream of emails and posts about facebook, twitter, et al, I figured I may as well chime in on my stance.

No.

Just no.

My feelings on social networks and web 2.0 in general strongly mirror Derek’s, who said it so well, I’ll just give you his words:

I have this thing about trying to keep my online existence stable, so if you link to something of mine, it will still be around in a few years. If I gave you my email address or ICQ account number in 1996, or my blog URL in 2000, it still works…. I like to have an archive that persists.

I have this blog. I have my photos on flickr. I have a profile on LinkedIn. I really think that’s enough. I’ve had the same email address and cell phone number for at least 8 years, with no intentions of changing them.

But when you get down to the nitty gritty of my reasons, it’s honestly mostly out of sheer laziness. It’s a universal truth that any product with staying power will do one of two things: Increase Pleasure or Reduce Pain. I enjoy blogging, I find WordPress easy to use. Pleasure Increased. I very rarely included pictures in my blog posts, because I found it a huge hassle to upload them to my webspace and remember the code to insert an image (doing it so rarely meant I never bothered memorizing it). Enter flickr, and whaddya know - an easy way to store my photos, and include them on my blog. Pain reduced.

As for LinkedIn - It’s an easy way for me to remain connected with past colleagues, especially now that I’m job hunting, and maintain a network in a fairly unobtrusive way. It also keeps professional networking easy for the socially uncomfortable (myself included) by setting the tone for a conversation. Asking my old boss for a recommendation on my LinkedIn profile is easy for both of us, rather than dropping him a line out of the blue and asking for referrals or references when we haven’t even spoken in 3 years. LinkedIn for me is reducing pain and increasing pleasure because I’ve gotten some great introductions through the service as well.

Don’t even get me started on Second Life. Dealing with Real Life is more than enough most days.

So while I’m not writing on walls, or tweeting, or soaring through virtual worlds, or whatever else people do on the myriad of social networks available - I AM on the internet. I’m googleable by about 12 different variations of my name, and not at all hard to find or get in touch with.

Also, curmudgeon that I am, I’m really trying to spend my energies on valuable and authentic social relationships. Someone who only finds me because I happen to be on facebook, and starts a conversation with “So, what’ve you been up to in the past… 10 years…” is, nine times out of ten, just curious about where people in their past are now. If there was actually a solid basis for friendship, we’d have probably kept in touch a little more regularly.

However, the person who takes the time to google, find my blog, photos or profile, and actually makes an effort to keep in touch a little longer than the lifecycle of the average social networking site (Friendster who?) - well that’s what I want online social networking to deliver.

Our true friends are those who are with us when the good things happen. They cheer us on and are pleased by our triumphs. False friends only appear at difficult times, with their sad, supportive faces, when, in fact, our suffering is serving to console them for their miserable lives.
~Paulo Coelho

It’s no secret to those who know me and care to ask that the whole job-hunt has me pretty miserable these days. I could say that I’m trying to harness the power of positive thinking and all that jazz, but in reality there are as many days that end with tears as those that end with smiles or just exhausted ambivalence.

Yet I still don’t feel compelled to blog about it.

About a year ago, you could hardly stop me from pouring out my misery online at being single and the horrible injustices I was suffering while attempting to find someone suitable to date. Or, if not suitable, at least not wanting to make me scoop my brains out with a spork to forget the encounter.

Then I found someone - and things were really steadily going up in my life. Great man, great job, great dog, great home. That lasted about a year - you’d think that wouldn’t be long enough to erase the cynicism, vitriol and spite in my wee, black heart when one of those ceased to exist in my world.

You’d be right. And still, I felt no compulsion to blog about it.

And I didn’t really understand why. Until now.

I attempted to throw a party last weekend. For all intents and purposes, most things about my social circle and the invite were the same. Early reports indicated it would be an even bigger success, since the location was far more desirable to potential party-goers. Last year, 90% of the people who RSVP’d “Yes” attended, plus a motley assortment of extras. This year, barely half the confirmed attendees bothered showing up.

What’s different?

This year I’m not nearly as interesting.

A year ago I was a dating blogging sensation, who had just entered into a relationship with a man who had his own fair share of scandal.

This year? We’re just another set of yuppies. For the most part, fortunate and exceedingly happy ones.

I could fill pages and pages with cutting testimony of my job-hunt frustrations and foibles.

But underneath it all lies a desire to keep these personal feelings for myself and those who have more than an idle curiosity about them.

I’d rather live quieter, knowing who my true friends are.

I’d rather be happy, than interesting.

I just wanted to interrupt your morning to gloat about the whole Daylight Savings thing.

I think it’s AWESOME!

Normally I’m a surly cow about the whole “losing an hour of sleep” thing - but that was before jetlag!

Since we got back, I have NOT been able to sleep past 4:00 or 5:00am (including the weekend). I was completely crashing out around 8:00pm. Naps were powerless against the jetlag.

And now? Last night when I was getting sleepy, the clock was well on its way to 10:00pm!

And this morning? I woke up mostly refreshed and ready to spring to life at 6:15am (which is when I normally wake up anyway).

Perhaps I should schedule some debilitating sleep deprivation before the time change every year!

You may now return to your regularly scheduled Monday.

No, not the fitness blitz that Neil and I started. This is an entirely different regimen.

I realized last Friday night that I am completely and utterly ill prepared for a trip to the UK.

I have completely and utterly lost any and all ability to hold my liquor.

I thought the Cinco de Mayo tequila bender was an isolated affair.

But then this past New Year’s Eve, half a bottle of wine and 2 glasses of champagne had me tossing my caviar mere moments into 2007.

And then on Friday night, 3 pints of beer (which would be nothing less than a year ago: witness - the amount of soju and beer consumed in Korea without repercussion) knocked me so flat on my arse that despite the 3 attempts it took to expunge the ale-soaked poutine from my body, I still had to “sleep” sitting-up on the couch, because the damn room refused to stop spinning. And I didn’t start feeling any sort of normal until well after noon the next day.

Considering I’m about to be let loose in a country with nearly as many pubs as people, this most certainly Will. Not. Do.

So I have put myself on a strict training regimen.

Starting tonight, I will drink beer, EVERY NIGHT, in increasing amounts until we leave. I have 8 days to get myself back into respectable drinking shape and avoid completely embarrassing myself on one of the UK’s omnipresent public cameras.

Combined with this, I’ll actually attempt to continue to get up and exercise each morning; the better to get used to hauling my sorry arse out of bed and doing something, even (and especially!) when I feel like doing anything but, and also to ensure that I still fit into my jeans (beer has serious calories!) when we leave.

And now, considering what very well may be the biological implications of such an endeavor, I am finally glad we have the awful rental apartment carpets that we do. I’d hate to do that kind of damage to our new hardwood.

So through the hectic haze that is the holidays in December, and then that long, slow January, I was feeling a little… off. My blog posting slowed, work slowed, I wasn’t out and about on the town much and really just wanted to hang out in my wee cocoon of home and man and dog and hibernate for a bit.

I’ve finally decided that’s enough of that, and it’s time to get back into the swing of things.

Between the hibernation and some small humps in my personal life, I feel as if I’ve lost a little something.

I am trying to reclaim that something, and part of the process is trying to be more authentic, which is something I’m struggling with lately.

I know that since I abandoned a life of continuously hitting the town, and firefighters puking over my balcony this blog has gotten boring. I try, I really do - but now I need some help. Anyone can go on bad dates and tell stories about them - but there were readers here long before that, and long after, so something must remain.

I am not playing in a delurking game, or whoring for comments and/or attention. I’m asking you, gentle reader, to help make this a better blog. This is for you! All I want you to do is answer this one question:

What do you think is my Unique Ability?

Apply this however you see fit - if you only know me through my blog, apply it that way. If you know me in person, consider that too. Heck, consider that alone and leave the blog out of it entirely if you think that it’s just gone too far down the tank to be relevant. Interpret unique ability in the way that strikes you as most correct for your world (there is no right or wrong answer) and tell me, either via email or in the comments.

But I’d like you to answer. Pretty please!

I’m posting this mostly as a reference and reminder to the man (who will swear right up until midnight on the 23rd that he has ages of time to do his shopping) - but also because I have not much else of substance to post, and on the off chance that the internets at large may want to buy me a gift (hey, a girl can dream, right?).

And so I present to you, after the jump, my wishlist for the Non-Denominational Consumer Orgy of Winter Spending 2006:
(more…)

It can never be a good thing when I have No One Cares What You Had for Lunch: 100 Ideas for Your Blog and an old diary in the same room.

In the spirit of Suggestion #7 - Examine Your Paperwork, I give you you, my diary entry from January 23rd, 1995 (I was 14.5 years old at that point). If this doesn’t meet your teenaged angst quota for the rest of 2006, then frankly, I’m not sure what will. Spelling and grammatical errors included for your enjoyment.
————————————————–
Dear Diary,

Sorry I haven’t written in a while, but nothing much has happened. Today however was completely different. For awhile I’ve liked Shaun M***. He’s a complete sweetheart, & he likes me too. Unfortunately, Christian just found & Shaun just happens to be his best friend. Christian told Sue-Anne he wanted to beat the shit outta Shaun. I told Shaun, now Shaun’s scared Shitless. I got mad at Christian, now Christian told Sue-Anne who told Shawn who told me that if he has to live without me (I told him I wanted to break up with him), He doesn’t want to live at all, he’s gonna kill himself.
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Sarah Brown, inspiration for this idea, and founder of Cringe, mentioned that if reading the diary entry makes you physically cringe, it’s funny.

God I hope so, for your sake.

Some lovely reader out there has nominated my blog for the Canadian Blog Awards.

Colour me flattered!

WorldWideWaterCooler is nominated in both the “Best Humour Blog” and “Best Personal Blog” categories.

Whoever send in the nominations, thanks so much.

Nominations close November 12th, and you can vote for your favourites starting on the 15th.