After the hustle and bustle of Christmas, and a few days on the North Island with cellular reception non-existent, and internet too spotty to bother using, I’ve been enjoying a very relaxed and decidedly un-wired holiday.
I think I’ll continue that for a few more days, though I did want to wish you all a very, very happy New Year.
I hope that when it’s all said and done you’ll have found that 2006 did indeed hold some good for you, and that 2007 is even better!
A very Merry Christmas to all!
Or Happy Monday if you swing like that.
My gift to you? One of my very favourite Christmas stories: Barrington Bunny by Martin Bell.
I’ve posted it in past years, you can read it here.
I hope you all have a wonderful, peaceful and rewarding Christmas Day full of everything you want this season, and a partridge in a pear tree.
Read Part the First here.
So Neil and I became engaged in Korea. And decided to keep it a secret until we could do it “right,” meaning until we could buy the ring we wanted, and start saving for the wedding.
We waited. And saved. And waited. And saved. And waited. And saved some more.
Of course, complicating matters was the fact that we’ve also bought a condo under construction, and have to have a significant sum saved for the rest of the down payment and closing costs.
More saving, more waiting.
Finally, in early November, the bank accounts were showing promise, and we realized we can make this happen for the Christmas holidays! We’re both Christmas fiends, and looked forward to being able to share our happy news at seasonal celebrations, when family and friends usually flung far and wide would be all together to break the news to in person!
So we trundled ourselves down to a local diamond vendor where I picked out a setting, and told Neil his job was to pick the sparkly stone to go in it.
And here’s where I tell you all that Neil is a TERRIBLE secret keeper!
He was so excited every step of the way, that he’d practically be bouncing up and down with glee on the days he’d gone over to the jewelry store to view another diamond that they’d brought in.
He thinks he was being subtle, but randomly showing up near my work (which he NEVER does) to go for lunch, when I know the jewellery store is halfway between his workplace and mine is a BIG hint.
Or the day he phoned saying he just got off the phone from a teleconference and was going to leave work now, and I can hear traffic in the background (instead of office noises, which is what I usually get).
Nevermind the day he came home, stared at me, and burst into a HUGE grin saying “I’m SO excited about finally getting officially engaged to you.” I knew that day the ring was ready, and most likely in the house.
Because my parents are quite traditional and he’s a gentleman, Neil went over to their house to speak with them before popping the question to me. That was Thursday December 7th. My parents phoned before he’d even left, and were ecstatic to hear the news and share their congratulations with us!
All that was left for Neil was the actual act of giving me the ring, and making it official to the rest of the world that we wanted to spend the rest of our lives together.
The night of the 7th, I don’t think either of us slept well - after over 6 months of waiting, there was nothing left to wait for, other than the perfect opportunity to present the perfect proposal.
So the morning of the 8th, we woke up and started our general morning routine. From the first night Neil stayed over at my place, we’ve had this “thing” we do…
For reasons still unknown to me, that first morning he woke up, bright-eyed and bushy tailed, and instead of being annoying (as I find most anything that doesn’t involve me still sleeping at that hour), he offered to make coffee. Let me tell you, there is no quicker way to get through the cracks in the cold, dark exterior of my black little heart, than with a cup of hot, fresh coffee. And it stuck. He gets up and makes coffee, I let the dog out of her crate and turn on the morning news, and our little family hangs out in bed for half an hour or so to start the day.
We’ve even shared our routine with other couples, and it’s SO cute and rewarding when someone says “hey - I told my boyfriend/fiancé/husband/whatever about how Neil brings you coffee in bed in the mornings, and he brought me a cappucino in bed today!” It’s always nice to have a reminder that we really do have a good thing going on.
So, the morning of December 8th. Neil can’t keep a secret, I’m giddy as all get-up, and there is a giant elephant (read: diamond ring) hanging out in the room.
We’ve both got our coffee, are half-watching the news, and Neil asks me “how elaborate a proposal story do you want to have to tell your friends?”
Of course I answered “I just want it done with love.”
So Neil reached behind his pillow, pulled out a blue velvet box, and said “You already know I love you so, so much, and I can’t wait until the rest of the world finally knows, will you marry me?”
I opened the box, saw the ring that took my breath away, looked at the man that stole my heart, and finally said “Yes.”
I know nobody’s asked, but I did want to post how Neil proposed - both because it’s adorable and I’d like to have it recorded for blog posterity, and because when I start posting the inevitable adventures in wedding planning, some of the plans will have more context for anyone who’s following along at home.
I’m posting this in two parts, because both are pretty long. Read Part the Second here.
It will probably come as a bit of a surprise to most that we’ve actually been engaged since May 20th (or 21st - depending on which timezone you were in…).
You see, we knew amost from the moment we met that there was something awfully special going on. We were both dancing around the issue, talking about ideal weddings and hypothetical children, leaving the elephant firmly entrenched in the room by not quite saying we wanted those things with eachother. Neil had also flat-out asked how formal a proposal I wanted. We knew. It was only a matter of time.
Fast forward a few weeks, and we found ourselves in Korea, very near the end of our travelling rope.
We’d spent 10 hours in the car - not quite hopelessly lost, but lost enough to just be pointing the car in what we hoped was the right direction, as we barreled through the South Korean countryside, trying to just get to the West Coast already, preferably before sunset.
The highway signs in rural Korea are abysmal. The map we had didn’t agree with them. The laptop containing iTunes and blasting out a soundtrack to at least distract us a little, was dead. And the only person in the car who could read Korean well enough to decipher the signage as we flew past the signs has (sorry Hannah) a serious left/right deficiency, enough to compromise her navigational skills all the way down into useless range.
The inevitable happened: the three of us devolved into screaming obscenities at eachother, and Neil pitched a fit and threw the map out the car window. That did offer Hannah and I an excuse to laugh maniacally at him for a few moments - but ultimately we spent the next couple hours in the car driving in stony silence.
Having long since missed sunset, we arrived at Daechon Beach, pulled into the first hotel we saw, and sulked off to our rooms. After recharging for an hour or so, we emerged and embarked on to what Neil and I still agree was the best night of the trip.
Daechon Beach, like many oceanside towns in South Korea, is lined with seafood tents. Under a huge awning are oil drums surrounded by plastic chairs. Over the drums are giant grates, and inside is a charcoal fire. The thing to do is park yourself at one of these, and the staff bring a bucket seafood from the live shellfish tanks out front, then dump it on the grate. Armed with only a thermal glove, a pair of tongs and some chopsticks, your mission is to wait for the tasty mollusks to sizzle their way to cooked, rip them out of their tiny, shelly homes and devour them - preferably dipped in some sweet-hot chili sauce and chased with lots of soju. It was novel, it was fun, it was DAMN tasty. And we soon put the earlier part of the day out of our heads.
After dinner, the thing to do is head down to the beach, newly stocked up with fresh bottles of soju, and buy fireworks off of one of the many vendors lining the boardwalk to make your own light show. And did we ever! We drank, we shot off geysers of gunpowder, we ran barefoot through the sand and surf. It was a moment of silly, exuberant, unrestrained, energetic fun.
And, in a soju induced haze of bliss as we stumbled back toward the street, I said “If we get married, I want it to be beautiful with the beach and fireworks and fun and love, just like this…”
As if enough sparks hadn’t been lit that night - I started one more.
We got back to our hotel room, drowsy and content, crawled under the covers and snuggled up.
And with the rainbow of neon from the boardwalk shining in and the sparkles of fireworks still going off at the beach outside our window, Neil said “Baby, I don’t know if the timing is right, and I know you want a ring, but I also know I love you so, so much, and can’t hold it in any more - will you marry me?”
And in between all the fireworks going off outside the window, and inside my head and my heart, I managed to get out the words “I absolutely will.”
I’ll admit, I haven’t exactly been feeling the Christmas Spirit the past little while.
Yes, we have the tree, and lights, and carols and parties galore! Not to mention, we’re young, in love, and engaged! Despite all that, things just haven’t been… cheery.
This morning over our usual Coffee and Breakfast TV in Bed, Neil and I figured out why: We’ve been trying to celebrate with people who are staunchly resisting celebration.
Now I know misery loves company and all that - you only need to glance toward any passel of angsty teenagers to figure that one out - but when did all these people I know turn into such… complainers and parade-rainer-on-ers?
Apparently unlike a lot of the people I’ve encountered of late, I’m pretty sure I’m managing to adhere to the “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all” school of interpersonal relations.
Unfortunately, after the week I’ve had, that mantra’s left me feeling mostly silent - because I refuse to let my good mood be dragged down and squelched by those who’d rather by cynical than celebratory.
Neil and I both spent FAR too many years of our lives with people whose default reaction to everything was negativity and suckitude.
NO MORE!
The present we’re giving to ourselves this year? Spending time only with those who can muster up a smile and a happy holidays without following it up with a complaint or criticism or contradiction of some sort.
As far as this (obviously somewhat hypocritical) little rant? It’s the official end of my own personal Grinchitude.
And my Christmas wish to everyone else? That you take some time to realize how very blessed you are in your own lives, and end your campaigns of crankiness as well!
I suppose I forgot to tell you all that the firefighter replied to my response to his initial email. He was kind and cordial and wished me all the happiness in the world (and apologized for being such a dumbass).
His surprise contact led to a lot of thinking about the past couple years, and the adventures in dating.
It almost seems surreal.
I mean, really. Reading back through the archives, I’ve been through a lot.
What do you do when you end up with a date who talks during movies? You ditch him of course.
What do you do when you find someone who thinks you’re not so much a real person as the sum of your blog posts? Dump him via the blog of course. Sayonnara.
How many times I suffered through being stood up, or subjected to just plain bad manners?
Maybe you give up and run away for some quality time on the beach like I did.
But then what do you do when you stumble upon the person of your dreams?
What do you do when you find someone whose sentences you finish, and who finishes yours? Someone who feels like an old friend from the moment you’ve met? Someone who actually meets and exceeds your Ridiculously High Standards and adds to your life in ways you never imagined? And (don’t read this part Mom & Dad) who also rocks your effin’ socks off in the bedroom, in ways you didn’t even know they could be rocked?
What do you do when you fall in love in an instant and can honestly say each day is better than the last? When you’ve found your soul mate, your perfect partner, your true love?
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I’m posting this mostly as a reference and reminder to the man (who will swear right up until midnight on the 23rd that he has ages of time to do his shopping) - but also because I have not much else of substance to post, and on the off chance that the internets at large may want to buy me a gift (hey, a girl can dream, right?).
And so I present to you, after the jump, my wishlist for the Non-Denominational Consumer Orgy of Winter Spending 2006:
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I made it through NaBloPoMo (hooray!), and promptly took a damn day off already!
But I did need to come back long enough to let all y’all know that if you’d like a Christmas Card from yours truly, you should definitely email me your address ASAP.
If you’ve sent me your address in past years, don’t assume I still have it. I’m notoriously bad at keeping such things (though I promise, this year I’m trying extra hard to actually make a freakin’ spreadsheet or something).
So what’re you waiting for? Christmas?
