Between cleaning the house and getting ready to host the man’s birthday festivities tonight, I didn’t have time to craft any sort of blog entry.
So instead, at the party I had all the guests contribute to a story. Rated R (cuz apparently I have some sick friends) and with a definite flair of “you had to be there,” it’s after the cut. Enjoy
It was a dark and stormy night. “Und der tankstellen Aggestellte Sagle” said the German Exchange Student after his turn at bite the bag. Meanwhile, Skyesat content in the corner, cradeling his faithful bottle of Vodka. Oblivious to the fact that it was actually filled with local tap water. which was actually Korean Vodka, which was filtered through 2 dozen chicken wings, making it taste just like barbecue – which really is the best kind of drink. The four-yar-old tyrannosaurus roared, in spite of his missing front tooth, in fact ecause of it, the impending fang signaling his physical transformation.
Of course had anybobdy cared to look out onto the balcony, they would have seen what the real intent of the party was… which, of course, was to have an excuse to drink lots of tequila. Bite the bag was coming to an end, the children were getting sleepy, and the adult party was about to begin. And it can be said that a party hasn’t truly started until at least half the people have seen Neil’s nether parts, whether frontal or rear (much to the dismay of his six new “friends” on the Internet who would rather Neil’s frontal or (cough) rear to themselves).
BEEP went the smoke detector, partly because of the sparkler smoke, partly because it was trying to swear but there were children present. Why is neil still wearing pants? Why are people still biting the bag? (Oh yes, the bag was bitten.) “Ouch!” screamed Neil after Jen bit his bag, while all the other girls licked his butt. “I adamantly refuse to participate in this sort of depraved debauchery.” He said as he continued to relentlessly pound her in the arm. Henceforth, the spanking ensued.
And then… there was soju.
I’ll try to figure out my scanner and post the hard copy, with diagrams, soon.