As usually happens when you are seeing someone on a level that your schedule dictates whose house you’ll be sleeping at that night, the boy had a pile of dirty clothes at my place.
And since I was doing laundry anyway, I figured I’d toss his dirty clothes in with mine (cuz I’m just sweet like that – all those losers from before really are missing out!).
That’s when it happened.
I discovered his man-funk is actually strong enough to nullify the effects of laundry detergent!
See, he has this shirt that he runs in. It’s allegedly a technical fabric, and as those fabrics do, it dissipates the sweat and nastiness throughout the whole garment to keep you dry. Dry, and very very smelly. He’d gone running in the shirt 3 or 4 times before it made it into the laundry. You do the math.
Into the washing machine it went, then into the dryer.
As I was emptying the dryer, I pulled the shirt out, and with it wafted that familiar foul aura. I didn’t believe it at first, but a few cautious whifs (remember, his armpits can smell like feet people) later, it was confirmed.
The shirt STILL stank!
After a wash cycle with Tide with Febreeze, Lavendar Vanilla Fabric Softener, and two Outdoor Fresh dryer sheets, it still smelled exactly like man-funk.
After a 10 hour soaking with more detergent and some time to line dry, the funkiness has somewhat dissipated. Now it smells like detergent and chemicals. Not pleasant, just different.
If the man can do that to a simple shirt, if his odiferoius self is strong enough that laundry detergent is no match for his essence, I shudder to think of what I may have gotten myself into.