I don’t know who started the rumour, but I am not perfect. I make mistakes just like everyone else.
No, I have not lost that first 5 lbs yet. Yes, I am still trying.
Yes, I wash my 6 white items with the rest of the light colours because I’m too cheap to spend $2 on an extra load of laundry. No, I do not care that my white t-shirt now looks a bit greyish.
Yes, some of that problem that happened was my fault. No, it was not *all* my fault. Yes, I will do my best to fix it. No, I am not positive that my solution will solve all your problems. Yes, I am certain I am doing the best I know how.
Now that you’ve all received the memo, would you please remove my bio from the “Perfect” file, and refile it under “Normal.”